Sisters

There comes a time when you stop being just friends & become sisters.

I remember reading this quote & thinking how much I wanted that. I wanted friends that I spent every moment with, attached at the hip, knew everything about them & they knew everything about me. I thought that's what that quote meant..

Now I've come to realize, through personal experience, what becoming family with former strangers really means. It's an unconditional love thing. It's not a time thing. It doesn't mean that you get to see each other everyday because life just doesn't work that way. It doesn't mean that you have to know everything that goes on in each other's lives either. It's simply that this girl is your sister- you would do anything in the world for her, and no matter what she says or does, you love her just the same. That's the thing about families - they can hurt you more than the average person can because you've opened yourself up to them, become vulnerable. They can point out a flaw or something you're insecure about & it feels devestating to you because you desire their approval more than others. Likewise, family can drive you more crazy than a "friend" can. Their little quirks or shortcomings can grate on your nerves sometimes for sure.

Becoming a family means letting go of the fear of rejection. You find it easy to just be yourself, let your guard down, relax & simply enjoy each other's company. These people can build you up or tear you down by just their words & actions. It can be kind of scary, to let people in like that, to open yourself up to pain. People in general can be self absorbed, selfish, thoughtless, inconsiderate, jealous, petty.. even those amazing people you adore have a little of those qualities in them and the more time that goes by, the more chances of you seeing those things come out in them. It can be so hurtful when a person who's supposed to love you unconditionally criticizes you or treats you carelessly. I've often heard, we hurt the ones we love. How sad, but true. The only way to not get hurt is to close yourself off completely.

I don't know when these girls became like sisters to me. It's been a few years now of birthday parties, holidays, lunches, play-dates, baby showers, celebrations, laughter & tears.. and tons of picture taking, lol. But I've come to appreciate our differences as well as our likenesses. I've come to enjoy their successes as much as I do my own. I've come to feel their pain as deep as if it were mine.

Love comes in gradually in different size pieces and there is no end to it. You start to see someone as an important part of who you are, where you are. You know losing them would be too painful to bear and so you start to hold them closer, more tightly and you start sacrificing other things like your time, energy, other relationships. Then the comfort comes in. The feeling of peace when you realize they aren't going anywhere. You've hurt them, they've hurt you, but you both stayed. That's when you become family - when you become comfortable.

Your sisters are the ones who see the best (and worst) IN you but always point out the good TO you. They will compliment you when you're picking yourself apart. They will show up early to your kid's birthday party just to help you get things ready & tell you to quit stressin. They will laugh at the fact that you're always late & always forgetting things instead of getting mad about it. They will never point out that your house is always a mess and call you supermom for any attempts at making things special for your kids. Most of all, they will love you no matter how much of a mess you are. I thank God for blessing me in this way. I know I would not be the same without my girls. I would be less and my life would be less. They make me feel like I can accomplish anything. They are my cheerleaders, my fans, but most of all.. they are my family.