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Joy found

Recently I've come to think that I am growing old in reverse. They say age aint nothin but a number, right? Well I was a serious, deep, painfully shy kid. I got hurt easily and felt misunderstood. I struggled to be "perfect" and got very down on myself when that didn't happen. Such a stark contrast to the person I turned out to be! Each year I feel I understand myself better and am so much more FREE to be me! I am usually light-hearted, joyful, spontaneous, up-for-anything and vivacious. I love life! God has filled my cup and I am so full of love that it bursts out of me! I verge on cheesiness at times, but that's okay. Life is so much more fun to me now. I just don't sweat the small stuff anymore. The down side is that I'm not as structured, organized or on top of things as I once was. I sometimes am not as responsible and I forget stuff.. but gone are the panic attacks, anxiety, and discontent. Sure my life is stressful, even more so now actually, but I've finally learned how to relax, lean on others and make time for myself once in awhile.
So maybe it's not that I'm becoming like a kid, but rather I've matured into realizing that other people's opinions don't really matter, life is worth LIVING, and the only way to grow is to just jump in there & do it and learn from your mistakes! God has blessed me way beyond anything I deserve so why shouldn't I be FULL OF JOY! He has given me grace so that I can extend that grace to others and give Him all the glory! I am free to like what I like, love everyone unconditionally, forgive easily, and throw any burden that comes my way down at the foot of the cross! I know that no matter what, everything will be okay! My Father is in control and He loves ME! I don't have to win an argument or seek revenge because I know the battle is already WON and I'm on the winning team! PRAISE THE LORD FOR HE IS GOOD!!! :) How can I help but smile!



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