Skip to main content

TOTALLY random! lol

We don't always get to choose the people in our lives. Sometimes they choose us. In fact what are the odds that the person who you most adore will adore you the most back? Rare, I'd say.

I like to seek out the good in people and there's certain qualities I admire: honesty, loyalty, sincerity, generousity, kindness, straight-forwardness, character, grace.. but the people we gravitate toward aren't always ones with these same qualities. In fact they may be lacking in what we value, but rather are outgoing, charming & full of witt or sarcasm or humor. It's the people who, for some reason, when we leave their presence, we feel good, and we're not sure why. These people want everyone to like them and they usually succeed. I mean, how could you not? They are fun to be around. It might be that these people have qualities that you wish you had. The problem with that is that they have lots of friends, and only ever let maybe two or three really "in." So when you're on the outside of that, and you love & care about them but hate how they don't tell you things or you feel like they don't care, you start to feel a little disillusioned. Like they've fallen from grace, so to speak, in your eyes. Maybe they're not as wonderful as we thought. NOT that you had any right to put them on a pedestal in the first place of course. Then you turn it on yourself & say maybe "I'm" not that wonderful and that's the problem. After all, who says we deserve anything from anyone anyway?
I was watching Grey's re-runs the other night & the thought hit me - I'm Izzie! That's me. There's always been a Meredith in my life who everyone thought was amazing & who I adored & would've done anything for.. and then the Yang came. So Izzie is nice to Yang & the three hang out all the while knowing that Yang & Meredith are each other's number 1 and Izzie is kinda just on the sidelines, along for the ride. Who is her number 1? And the sad thing is that Meredith & Yang feed off each other's negativity, they actually reinforce each other's issues and make them worse. Kinda a misery loves company thing I guess. And yet, we all love the two of them together, it's my favorite element of the whole show!
Now don't get me wrong, I know I have lots of friends, really good ones, who are amazing & I love them so much it hurts sometimes. I guess that's just the way God made me, a deep feeler.. if that's even a word, lol. I'm okay with that. I know that comes with pain sometimes, but I'm willing to take the risk with people because I believe people are what matters. Lol, that's exactly the phrase Meredith & Yang poke fun at and disagree with on one episode so that shows I wouldn't be cool enough to hang w/ them! Ha! It's okay to be Izzie tho. She may not have always gotten what she wanted in way of friendships, but what she did get was love. Real love. And she wasn't afraid to jump in head first even after she'd been hurt before.. and it was so worth it in the end. Yep, I'm definately Izzie :)



Popular posts from this blog

And everything has changed

I find it so hard to put this into words because it's so big, but I can try to sum it up by saying The Unedited Retreat pricked my heart & put me in a posture to truly hear from the Lord. And I am so grateful. My testimony begins last year at Pine Cove Family Camp when a verse struck me, hard. - Gal 2:20. Not that I hadn't heard it before but that maybe I felt it deeper. 
“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” ‭‭Galatians‬ ‭2:20‬ ‭ESV‬‬
No life of my own? Had I really been living that way? Complete surrender? I started "trying harder" after that.

I attended another Unedited Movement event in the fall with my eternity-friends. 😊 I came home & begged Mike to go with me to visit our Pastor. By God's grace my heart was dug up from where it had been buried under a moun…

The Problem is..

Every problem is rooted in sin.The problem actually IS sin. Whether it’s their sin, your sin, it’s all sin and it’s at the foundation of every conflict, hurt feeling, misunderstanding, and unloving act. Sin is our problem. It’s your problem.
Do you feel something in you that wants to flee right now? What if I said this to your face? Would you receive it?
It is in our nature to fight against it. We seem to want to point fingers, blame’s not us, it’s them. We have no sin, right? Of course not. Most people will admit that they are a sinner, but they will not own up to their actual sins. Instead we justify it, make light of it, try to explain it away. We call it a short-coming or maybe just a mistake. And everyone makes mistakes.
Why are we so adamant to deny our sin? Satan is the Father of lies
I just listened to a John Bevere video clip explaining that Hell was created for Satan not for man. It was a place for him & his angels. So he is out to deceive and mislead as…
Speak up. Say it. Just be honest. It's not as hard as it seems. And it gets a little easier the more you practice it. Be straightforward and people will come to respect you for it. Avoiding conflict is only helpful if you can let it go. Harboring hate or hurt leads to conflict eventually anyway and by then it's all built up! 💣😱
Conflict is inevitable because everyone has their own truth & perception & outside influences that WILL clash with someone else's at some point. But getting everything out on the table at least opens you up to forgiveness, grace, peace and the possibility of reconciliation which are a necessity in any real relationship. 💯💙
It's easy to be blinded by your pain but since everyone will hurt you, let you down, disappoint you, get mad at you, be irritated with you, do things you wish they wouldn't, mistreat you, not meet your expectations in some way, exclude you, or take you for granted at some point you might as well learn to resolv…